The Reason Self Help Fails

(1.vi) Learn How To Attract Positives!

This scientific brain research lesson will help you understand the reason why you could be attracting so much negativity into your life.

I religiously followed all the instructions I could find on how to set and achieve goals. I understood and worked hard at applying positive thinking to change my life.

Only when I discovered the information in this section was I able to see the reason why I continued to draw people and circumstances I did not desire, into my life.


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Allow me to briefly tell you a story about myself. I always seemed to meet and date women who were cold, uncaring and unfaithful. I tried desperately to break out of this habit but it seemed no matter what I did, I ended up with another drama queen.

I became so fed up with dating I actually sat down and decided to set a goal on meeting my dream mate.

It was quite some time ago when I set the goal, but I believe it went something like this:

  • I will not become involved with any woman who is cold or uncaring.
  • I will easily avoid women who are unfaithful.
  • I will not attract women who are energy vampires.

(There was actually a lot more to the goal, but this is the part I want you to understand.)

Guess what – it didn’t work. I continued attracting the wrong mates and suffered an emotional hell because of it. I was beginning to believe this was my destiny.

I couldn’t figure out the reason this positive power thinking stuff wasn’t working for me. Then I began learning about the recent scientific brain research discoveries I have been explaining here in Step One.

I discovered the reason for my dating nightmares was “failure by design.” Yes, I was mistakenly designing my own failure without even being aware of how I was doing it.

Here is the reason for my (and probably your) “failure by design.”

Our subconscious mind does not distinguish between negative and positive!

This means whenever you are focusing on something you don’t want, the subconscious believes it is something you DO WANT.

Here I was focusing on what I didn’t want (the wrong mate). This is truly the psychology of self-deception!!!

Be aware and avoid focusing on what you "don’t want." Inadvertently this is failure by design, as you are unconsciously applying negative positive goals.

In other words, the positive aspect would be the desire for good relationships, but the negative aspect is the focus on what you don’t want – wrong type of mates.

My daughter was regularly involved in minor car accidents. I explained how we attract events into our lives and convinced her to set a few goals to prove how effective they are.

She did, and she also kept having these minor accidents. In discussion about this problem, she told me her goal was to avoid being in accidents.

A light went on, and I realized the reason she kept getting into accidents was her negative positive statement. Her subconscious was giving her exactly what she focused on and didn't want - accidents.

It has been over two years now since she made the minor goal change to "I am always safe and protected while driving my car." She hasn't had an accident since then.

Often people set goals for the things they want to avoid such as losing their house, their job, their health or their relationship.

The reason you keep getting what you don't want is your subconscious mind, being a faithful servant, only understands your focus and doesn't decide if it is a negative or positive.

To enlist the help of your subconscious to attract desirable results, change your goal to a positive/positive.

Your goals will then reflect that which you desire - a positive/positive - instead of what you don't want - a negative positive.

Once I changed my relationship goal to: “I only attract loving, caring and faithful people into my life” I did meet a wonderful mate whom I am proud to say is now my wife.

It is important to understand whatever you focus on is what the subconscious believes you want.

Being an extremely powerful servant, the subconscious then works diligently to provide what you desire.

I think most of us don't realize we fail due to focusing on the wrong goals. Become "unstuck" and apply only positive/positive statements and goals.

You will see an almost immediate shift in what you attract.

Now you know the reason why you create your own "failure by design" with negative positive goals.

Are you ready for the next brain science lesson?


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